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  • Writer's pictureDolly Dakota

In Search of 2 Ply Toilet Paper


Almost a month ago I ended up in the hospital when we thought I may have internal bleeding. I had some bright red bowel movements that were scary. After a colonoscopy that was clear, minus a friable mucosa that was biopsied, I was sent home. Medical team felt it was caused by my new chemo med, Lenvima. I was off it for about a week while we waited for the biopsy, which came back clear.


I restarted my chemo and boy did the side effects come rushing back, in full force. I feel like I can just go down the list and say...yup, got that one and that one, that one, yup that one too. Instead of a bingo card, imagine a chemo card with side effects under each letter. I did better than a straight bingo... I scored a blackout!


I have been having diarrhea, not bad but enough that I took my prescribed meds to help with it. They helped for about 3 days. This past Friday I woke up at 5am... needing to throw up. I did. And again. And again. I thought what next? Wrong to think that. The diarrhea took over. Friday all day I had it. Saturday was the same, started the day with throwing up and continuing with living in the bathroom. Sunday my body gave me a bit of a break until the evening when my break was over.


Monday morning, no vomiting but the bathroom was still my best friend. I reached out to my oncologist to tell her. I said I am taking the meds but still going thru a roll of toilet paper a day...the meds are useless. I tell her I have nasty burps all day too. She calls in new meds and sets me up to get fluids on Tuesday. Oh great. I also tell her I have been drinking lots of Gatorade to replace electrolytes.


After work I go to the pharmacy for the new meds. The pharmacist-new guy explains dosage to me and says these meds have side effects. I sighed and kind of went "....eehhh". The pharmacist then gets a bit huffy and says, sternly, "medicines have side effects!" I grabbed my bag and walked away.


With all the stuff I have been thru, now into the start of my 5th year of fighting and surviving cancer, I know about side effects! I know more about cancer terms. blood panels, chemotherapy drugs, immunology drugs, cancer markers, procedures and survival rates than most people. DO NOT GET HUFFY WITH ME!!! I am tired, frustrated, fatigued, overwhelmed, drained (physically, emotionally and financially), YOU DO NOT WANT TO START WITH ME!!!!!



I started taking the new meds last night. They did slow down the "flow" but not entirely. Today I went in for my fluids. My oncology nurse Kayla, who has been one of my nurses from the beginning, is mine today. She asks all kinds of questions, when did I last have labs, how many times am I having diarrhea, what color is it, how do I feel, what is my appetite like? I had labs 2 weeks ago, I use a roll of toilet paper a day, its black, I feel weak and have no energy, I am not really hungry, but I try to eat healthy. She didn't like my answers and she ordered labs and called my oncologist.


Kayla thinks its not the chemo causing the diarrhea, she thinks I may have a stomach ulcer that requires surgery to fix. She gives me my fluids and sends me home with a stool sample kit to determine how much blood is ending up in my toilet bowl. Oh great.


So...I will do my kit, and see what is next in my battle. I must warn you, if you see me with 2 large bundles of toilet paper in my cart....say nothing....keep moving...or remind me to get a 24 pack of Gatorade too. But here is your warning. Now is not the time to critique me or offer unsolicited advice, I might just blow up on you and smack you with my Gatorade pack. Now please excuse me...my throne is calling.

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